Bad things happen to everyone at times. I used to feel like bad things always happened to me, and if something was going to go wrong, it was going to be in my life. I expected it.
That was until I learned something.
I learned one thing I could do to stop being a magnet for bad things.
The change didn’t happen immediately. It wasn’t magical. But over time it has completely turned my life around. All I did was change one thing and I stopped a lot of bad things from happening in my life.
I didn’t even understand why this one thing worked. And to some degree, it’s still a mystery. But I know it’s true.
My life is an example that we really do have the power to stop a lot of bad things.
You have the power to stop a lot of bad things.
You have the power to stop a lot of bad things. Share on X
WHERE THE POWER IS
It all started by learning the most powerful thing we have is on our face. And the most powerful thing we can have anything to do with is the Word of God.
You might think I mean the Bible. But ink on paper alone isn’t the power.
The power comes when the words are infused by the Spirit of Grace. And the power on your face is your mouth.
The power to stop bad things is in what you’re saying.
The power to stop bad things is in what you’re saying. Share on X
HOW THE POWER WORKS
The Spirit of Grace showed me the power in my mouth with me these words.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof. Proverbs 18:21
I didn’t understand those words.
He showed me that with what I was saying I was causing bad things to come to me.
I was calling for negative things to come into my life.
I was exercising faith in bad things happening by talking about it all the time.
When bad things happened, I’d complain. I’d whine. I’d grumble. My words were reinforcing the negative flow toward me.
I was making myself miserable, when I had the power to not be.
The Spirit of Grace wants you to have good things in your life. Share on X
FOR EXAMPLE
When I was a newlywed, whenever we went out to eat, I’d get a fork with the tines all bent, I’d have a chair that would wobble, and whenever I ordered eggs there were always shells in them.
Every.
Time.
And every time it happened, I’d complain out loud “I always get a bent fork” “I always get a wobbly chair” “I always get shells in my eggs”. But I’d never speak up to fix the situation. I never asked for a new fork, changed chairs or got new eggs. I felt I deserved those problems. I felt I deserved problems in general. I gave myself no value.
My husband had his own version of this negativity involving a derogatory nickname he called himself whenever he spilled food, especially on himself. He came to expect it. It brought the same dejected feelings I felt when I complained, and he spilled food on himself all the time.
The Spirit of Grace directed us to stop saying those things. At first, it was hard. We were used to talking like that.
But we made the change little by little. We started saying something else instead. I started speaking up for myself. Now those things rarely happen to either of us.
Those are small examples, but this one change of habit and attitude has changed our lives in every area. Now we use our mouths to say good and positive things intentionally and it brings good things to us.
The power to stop bad things can also bring good.
The power to stop bad things can also bring good. Share on X
RECENTLY
I was reminded of this recently when I was in the process of buying my first new car.
I have to tell you that buying a new car is part of how my life has changed. A brand-new car is a good thing I never owned before. I remember driving cars with holes in the floor, doors held closed with rope, and duct tape on the windows to keep them up.
Buying a good used car was a dream come true.
This new car is beyond a dream. I’m amazed at how our lives have changed by this one thing – what we say.
My recent example:
The entrance to the dealership has double doors. I’m right handed so reached for the door on the right. It was locked but the left one was open. Entering and leaving the building this one day I repeatedly reached for the door that was locked.
After a few times, I felt like complaining and berating myself saying “I always reach for the wrong door”.
But I caught myself and said something else instead. I said “I’ll get it” meaning I’ll get it right, speaking confidence in myself to stop making the mistake. The next time I did it. I reached for the unlocked door.
That’s another small example but the premise remains. God has given us the ability to call what we want into our lives. The Bible words it calleth those things that are not, as those that are. Romans 4:17
I didn’t understand those words either at the beginning.
Yet following the direction of the Spirit of Grace, changing how I talked even when I didn’t understand, still changed my life.
I’m so glad that to receive the good things God has for us we don’t have to fully understand. All we need to do is follow His directions.
The Spirit of Grace wants you to have good things in your life.
To receive the good things God has for us we don’t have to fully understand. Share on X
WHAT NEXT
If you feel like a magnet for bad things ask yourself these 2 questions:
- Do you always say things like – I always get into car accidents. I always ruin relationships. My car always breaks down…
- Are you willing to do this one thing and own what you say and make a change?
If you’ve made this change already, share how it’s changed your life in the comments. Encourage someone else with your story.
I agree that it is not always what we say but also what we think. Focus on the positive.
Thank you, Karen.
I agree that what we think is powerful also.
Thanks for sharing.
I started making a habit of saying positive affirmations every day and it has changed my life. I no longer experience financial set-backs.
That’s awesome, Joy! I’m so happy for you.
Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for sharing this. This came at just the right time. I got a flat tire on my car today and it seemed like I have been through so much already. I have been trying to speak the right things but I think I need help with my attitudes I was getting really frustrated and angry and trying to calm myself down today. I keep praying for the Lord to help me and for the good blessings of God to flow.
You’re welcome, Kim. I’m so happy it was timely for you.
It’s so easy to off with negative words when our emotions get poked in some way. And you’re right, it’s not just about speaking “the right words”. It’s about what’s going on inside us. That’s where the work is really done and it’s a lifelong process. Don’t forget to give yourself grace.
One place where I have to work at this a lot is when driving in traffic and someone cuts me off, is going too slow, or anything else I find irritating. I was given a suggestion from a pastor of mine about six years ago. He said that when that happens (he gave examples in his life), to say “bless you” to that person. It sounds weird and it’s even harder to do, but it has been a game changer for me. That person who did something and I got upset has no emotional effect – I do. Saying that in the heat of the emotion (through clenched teeth sometimes) changes the emotional atmosphere inside me and the anger dissipates almost immediately. It’s really quite amazing. I’m much better at it now – six years later. Remember – grace!
I believe this is why Jesus invited us to pray for our enemies.
I agree, Hazel. Thanks for sharing.
So good! Thanks for this! Love the life application examples.
You’re welcome, Doris. Glad you enjoyed it.
Thank you for reading and commenting!
I am going to try this! I had a terrible week – it felt like one thing after another. I Googled “how to stop having bad things happen to me” and this popped up! Reading this and these replies has been so inspiring to me! I literally can see how I have some of the habits above. Also I think I was even praying out of desperation – maybe even my prayers sound like complaining or reinforcements for negativity. I need to change my mindset! Thank you! Thank God I saw this article.
I’m sorry you had a terrible week, but thankful my article was inspiring and helpful. Thank you for sharing with me. Praying for your success and sending love.
What we say to ourselves makes a big difference. I’m so happy for His Spirit of Grace to help us with our words and thoughts. I need that! Thank you for sharing this, Danielle!
You’re welcome, Leslie.
His Spirit of Grace makes all the difference.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Thank you for this simple but powerful reminder! It’s so easy to see how this defeatist, negative self-talk affects those around us but not so easy to see how we are doing it to ourselves. I think sometimes it just becomes automatic. Knowing that we have the power to turn things around, though, is strong encouragement to start paying attention to the way we talk to ourselves!
You’re welcome, Kate.
You’re right. It is so easy to speak the negative. I need to remind myself all the time.
Thanks for sharing.
My life is in pain.
I’m so sorry. I hope my words were an encouragement to you in some way.
i have cancer.
I’m sorry.
Praying for you.
I generally love this way of thinking thank you so much for the insight ive been blaming myself for all my misbrings but know im taking control back on my life positive talking form this day forward im not going to down talk myself thanks alot.
You’re welcome, Tanisha. I’m happy to help.
Prayers for your success in taking ownership of your life.