How to Find Your Quiet
Photo by Simon Wilkes on Unsplash

How to Find Your Quiet

 

We live loud, busy lives. Going, going, going all the time on the outside with noisy minds on the inside. How can we find any quiet spaces in our lives? How can we calm our inner world? It’s not easy but I found a way. And if I did, you can find your quiet too.

Every day I have a designated “quiet time”. It’s time by myself where I go to connect to the Love that heals. I read, pray, listen to music and speak daily affirmations. I enjoy it.

But some days my quiet time isn’t so quiet.

Some days, I have a hard time quieting myself. Thoughts racing, emotions all over the place and my body fidgety. I’ll read my daily affirmations and scriptures but be distracted by all the inner noise.

Sometimes I listen to more music to calm me and it doesn’t work.

But some days my quiet time isn’t so quiet. Share on X

 

How do I get myself to be internally quiet?

I read an article that inspired me to give quiet meditation a try.

I’ll explain how it works but first I need to tell you about the grace. The grace in the article is what inspired me.

I’m a task-oriented person so if I’m going to meditate then I’m gonna do it right! That’s how the oppressive perfectionist overworker in me approaches things. I’ve been known to try so hard I hurt myself.

I need grace.

  • Grace said start small with just one or two minutes.
  • Grace said to use a timer.
  • Grace said you’ll get distracted and that’s ok. It’s even normal.
  • Grace said it will take time and practice.

You’re supposed to do it every day so I decided on 2 minutes each day.

I need grace. Share on X

 

How did I do?

I failed.

I failed to remember to take 2 minutes every day even though I had it written down.

I failed to consider it a priority.

I failed to remember it worked when I did practice it.

Until.

Grace. 

  • Grace reminded me I had practiced the meditation half the time.
  • Grace reminded me being distracted is normal.
  • Grace reminded me I found a measure of quiet.
  • Grace said just try again.

I stopped beating myself with the perfectionist stick and tried again.

I stopped beating myself with the perfectionist stick and tried again. Share on X

 

How grace led me to my quiet

Some days the inner noise is louder than others. This was one of those days.

I had a whirlwind of inner noise when I remembered the quiet meditation I was supposed to be doing daily.

It took four tries in one day but grace led me to the quiet I needed.

The first time I failed to turn the timer on. The second time my attitude was wrong. The third time was later, after trying to calm myself by pacing and quietly praying.

The fourth time I was committed.

  • I sat myself down and put my phone on airplane mode.
  • I set the timer and did what the article taught me.
  • Sit still with eyes closed and breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out.
  • Focus on the breath. When thoughts come focus on your breath and dismiss the thoughts.

It’s hard work to empty your mind and focus on nothing.

It’s hard work to empty your mind and focus on nothing. Share on X

Grace.

Grace is allowing yourself to be ok with thoughts that come – just return to the breath. The goal is to develop awareness. This awareness gives us power.

Are you aware you’re tense? Notice it and breathe.

  • I noticed tingling in my body from stress. Breathe.
  • I noticed my hands on my lap were tense, tight-fisted. Breathe.
  • I moved my arms to a place they could relax better. Breathe.

Going from thought to breath is like a dance.

Before I knew it the timer went off. I wanted to turn it back on again because I found my quiet and liked it there.

But I can’t live in the practice of quiet meditation—I have to learn how to take it with me.

I can’t live in the practice of quiet meditation—I have to learn how to take it with me. Share on X

Grace.

 

How finding your quiet will help you

This quiet meditation teaches you how to govern over your thoughts and make room for quiet. The quiet also calms your body. This is good self-care.

Learning to create an inner quiet empowers you to be more intentional in your life. The rat race around you won’t find a home within you. Your life will have more peace.

Being able to quiet your soul enables you to hear the Spirit of Grace when he quietly speaks to you. This will bring you joy.

Your life will have more peace. Share on X

 

Your turn:

  • Take ONE minute. That’s all, just one minute. Put your phone in airplane mode. Find a spot where you can be undisturbed for that ONE minute. Set a timer for one minute and sit. Close your eyes and simply breathe.
  • After you do this let me know what you think.
  • Dare to decide you’re worth taking a minute to find your quiet – free download here.

 

 

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author avatar
Danielle Bernock
Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

Danielle Bernock

Author, Coach, and Speaker helping men, women, and organizations EMERGE with clear vision of their value, TAKE ownership of their choices, and CHART a path to their promise, becoming Victorious Souls who Embrace The Change from survive to thrive through the power of the love of God

This Post Has 24 Comments

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Dave.
      Thanks for reading and commenting!

  1. Quiet and solitude is a lost art in our overly-connected world!

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Art. I like connecting that word to it. Thanks!

  2. Very good I’ve recently been focusing on this taking good 15-30 min sometimes to just declutter the mind listening to calming music mindfulness of the body.

    1. Danielle Bernock

      That’s awesome, Danen.
      Thanks for sharing!

  3. Danielle, I can totally relate to this article. Loved your thoughts here, especially about what Grace said.

    1. Danielle Bernock

      That’s awesome, Leslie. I’m so glad to hear it.
      Learning the truth about Grace has changed my life.
      Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts!

  4. mendellrachel7

    Yes! Taking the quiet with me … I do that and I think it’s the only way I have survived … a moment of quiet in my car before going in to work or some stressful situation … a short walk back to my oak tree – where it’s quiet and I can be quiet … Love this post!

    1. Danielle Bernock

      That’s wonderful, Rachel.
      Thank you. And thank you for sharing how you find your quiet!

  5. I absolutely love this. I did a mindfulness practice consistently when I was in DBT and I’ve let it fall off. You’ve reminded me how much I loved it and encouraged me to get it started back up. Thank you!

    1. Danielle Bernock

      That’s awesome, Teresa. Happy dancing with you!
      Thanks for sharing 💞
      What is DBT?

  6. Excellent post Danielle! One I can relate to right now. I was encouraged by reading this tonight!
    Love the one minute suggestion at the end. Totally worked for me. 😀

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Cori. I’m happy to hear it encouraged you. I’m glad you took a minute and it worked for you. It’s amazing how just 1 minute can make a difference.
      Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts.

  7. megkonovska

    Welcome to meditation! <3 🙂 With practise, you can learn how to take it with you – I particularly like walking meditations and turning my workout routine into a mindfulness practice 😉
    Just trust the Grace 🙂

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Meg.
      I’m really enjoying it now. I haven’t missed a day since I wrote this.
      Yesterday I was having a particularly rough day and did it twice. It was so helpful.

      How do you do walking meditations?

      Thank you for reading and commenting!

  8. Excellent advice, Danielle. Thanks for sharing your journey. Thanks for clarifying that it is hard work ,and that it’s okay to fail. That’s why it’s called a practice.

    I try to model keeping quiet time for my daughter. Whenever she says she’s bored I say, “How fortunate for you. I hope you use it wisely.”

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Shayne.
      I was amazed at how difficult it was to be still for just 60 seconds the first time.
      Since I wrote this I’ve been consistent every day with 3 minutes and it’s wonderful.

      That’s awesome about your daughter.

      Thanks for reading and sharing!

  9. I find last thing at night is best – the house is quiet, I’m tired, I’ve stopped ‘doing’ and switched off my computer – so I must be finished. I switch off the light and sit in the dark – doing all the stuff you just said. It is very relaxing.

    1. Danielle Bernock

      That’s wonderful that you have a time set aside.
      Thank you for sharing how you find your quiet!

  10. Well said! This is something I was working on and got away from. I need to get back to it. Thanks for this post

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Kathryn.
      Glad it was helpful for you!
      Thanks for reading and commenting.

  11. Arulnathan John

    Great stuff Danielle. Thank you for sharing this!:):)

    1. Danielle Bernock

      Thank you, Arul. And you’re welcome.
      I’m glad it was helpful for you. Thank you for leaving a comment and letting me know.

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